（1） I Wasn't Asleep
我没有睡着
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"
当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒！”
"I wasn't asleep," the man answered.
“我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。
"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."
“没睡着？可是你眼睛都闭上了呀？”
"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."
“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。”
（2）A Smart Housewife.
精明的家庭主妇
A smart housewife was told that there was a kind of stove which would only consume half of the coal she was burning.
一位精明的家庭主妇听人说有一种炉子用起来可以比她现在用的炉子省一半的煤。
She was very excited, and said: "That'll be terrific! Since one stove can save half of the coal, if I buy two, no coal will be needed!"
她听了大为兴奋，说：“那太好了！一个炉子可以省一半的煤，那么如果我买两个炉子的话，不就可以把煤全都省下来了吗？”
（3）secret
秘密
A kid complains a computer problem.
有个孩子抱怨电脑有问题。
Kid: When I type computer password, it just shows star star star star. What's the joke?
孩子：当我输入密码时，它只显示星号，星号，开什么玩笑呀。
Man: Dear kid, those stars are to protect you, so that if a person standing behind, he can't read your password.
大人：亲爱的孩子，这些星号是用来保护你的，即使你身旁站着一个人，他也没法知道你的密码。
Kid: Yeah, but stars appear even when there is no one standing behind me.
孩子：哦，但是没有人站在我身旁，它还是显示星号。
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